Checkmate!

I have played thousands of chess games at this point. I started out playing mostly on a different chess site for about 2 years. I still had an account here on Lichess, but I mainly used it to practice unlimited puzzles since the other site required a paid subscription to access the tools that really help players make progress. (FYI, shameless plug, I like Lichess the best for oh so many reasons.) So in addition to the 4,784 games I have now played here, you would probably need to add another 8,000 from the other site, plus who knows how many over-the-board games. I think, like many players, I developed a pattern of how I liked the games to end. In order of preference, I would prefer to checkmate my opponent, or to win because of time, or to win because my opponent resigned, or to have a draw if the player is stronger than me, or to have a loss. To win because my opponent left a game online is not so enjoyable because I never know if he had Internet trouble and if claiming a victory is justified. To win because my opponent cheated is just insulting, and even if I get points back, it is still quite annoying. The worst-case scenario for me is to have a stalemate in a game I should have won. It hurts more than a loss.

Winning by Checkmate

Of course, this is by far the most satisfying outcome. There is nothing better than a sneaky, nasty, downright disrespectful, so to speak, in-your-face checkmate delivered to a stronger player who was giving me a lot of smack talk. Oh, it's just delicious! Nothing makes my heart dance quite like that. Of course, I don't rub it in at the moment, but it is hard to hold back a smile when a guy is sitting across from me in shock that he lost to a rookie. I try really hard to be a good sport, so I only tease a handful of opponents who I know can take it because they dish it out when they win pretty regularly. It is important to have that kind of rapport before running your mouth, or it could cause some unnecessary drama, which I am not interested in. Winning by checkmate online doesn't quite have the same "kick" to it as when playing in-person, but hey, a win is a win, and it really only gets me excited when I snag a win from a stronger player. Beating a player who is lower-rated isn't that exciting because it is the expected outcome. I have had some lower rated players give me a run for my money, though, so I never underestimate them. When I play them, I usually try out tactics I just learned to try to understand what is possible, so if I mess it up, I can try to recover without getting punished so badly that the game is unredeemable.

Players who play me a lot know that I prefer the queen-knight checkmate, so it is hard to get the set-up for that anymore since they see it coming a mile away. Same with the queen-bishop mate and the back rank rook mate. So usually it is a fight to the bitter end, crowding the king until I can find a smother mate or some other, just as devious, combo.

Winning by Resignation

This one has me a bit torn. I know players who will often resign if they are down by material because a professional player would do so since he figures it is a lost game IF THEY BOTH PLAY PERFECTLY. I am not as likely to resign because I know that as beginners, we often blunder, and even if I am down material, I know if I avoid trading, eventually, I might be able to steal a piece and get back in the game. I usually play to the absolute end, unless it is completely hopeless and I am already tired.

Winning on Time

Depending on my opponent, this kind of win can still feel nice. If it is a weaker player and he is in a winning position, but just running out of time, I do occasionally add more time to his clock to let him find the mate, just because I know how aggravating it is to lose on time when the game was yours. I won't resign, though. I want to give him the opportunity to find the mate. I don't know; my teacher instincts kick into gear, and I can't help myself.
Oh, I will tell you a little naughty secret... yikes... I hope I don't get a lot of backlash for this, but I get really annoyed with players who run the clock when they see that they are about to lose the game. I used to have to wait for them to let their clock run all the way out and then report them, but somehow it did not seem fair that they were in control of the outcome of the game and how long I was forced to sit there waiting for a win when clearly they lost. So I adopted a new tactic. They want to waste my time to punish me, so I decide to waste theirs as well. I ADD time to their clock, and I tell them in the chat to either move or resign; I'll wait. Then I turn the sound all the way up on my computer so I can hear if they move, and I start cleaning my apartment while listening for their final move. If they move, I mate them. If they wait, I don't care; my apartment can always use a good touch-up, and I don't care what time of day I clean. Usually, they get bored before I do, and they resign or leave the game. AND then I report and block them. I apologize to Lichess if this somehow breaks a rule, but I don't think it does. Feel free to correct me if I am wrong, and I can change this strategy. I mean, theoretically, the guy needs time to find a MIRACLE on the board; perhaps his king would sprout wings and fly to a different square or an invisible queen would appear if we wait long enough, and I am just POLITELY giving him all the time he needs, wink, wink. I'm thinking, "Go ahead, honey, think it over." I figure if they want to waste my time, well, let's waste time together, darling, and I'm ok with that. It is just deeply ingrained in my soul that I cannot reward bad behavior, so if we have to engage in this different type of battle, so be it. I will meet you at your level. My one goal is to discourage this type of behavior to make it a better playing experience for others, because after a game like that, we will not be playing again. All that being said, because I do play a lot late at night, I have accidentally fallen asleep mid-game and let my time run out. I feel absolutely horrible when this happens, and I usually DM the guy and apologize profusely, explaining what happened. I promise, if you are playing me, I would never let my clock run out on purpose; it is just Rude, yes, with a capital R.

Winning because my Opponent Left the Game

I am always conflicted when this happens because I don't know if the guy really left the game or if his Internet connection tanked. Either way, I just don't have the heart to kill my rating by hitting the draw button. Sorry guys. You win some, you lose some. I have had this happen to me too when I am winning and my Internet disconnects. It is no fun, but I recover quickly. I hope others do too. Now, if he is just leaving the game because he is a bad sport, snatching a victory doesn't bother me at all. The other scenario is that he is new to the site and doesn't realize he needs to resign before starting a new game. This would have still been a win for me, so I also feel ok about grabbing the rating points.

Winning because my Opponent Cheated

Ugh, don't play me if you want to cheat. It is not interesting at all. I didn't come to Lichess to play you AND a computer. I came for a game of wits. If you can't bring that intelligence, move on. Don't waste my time.

Draws

If I draw because I can't find a mate on time, that is one of the most devastating outcomes, but it also pushes me to learn more and move faster. I try really hard to always learn from my mistakes. If I am losing and I can force a draw, well, that is glorious! (Especially if the draw is with a player higher rated than me... I consider this a win!) Draws because of insufficient material vs. time running out are not as interesting, but life goes on. Next game!

Stalemate

Oh, the bitterness of a stalemate. I think it is the worst fate for any player if he is winning and accidentally sets up a stalemate. So many times I have pushed a pawn wrong or placed my queen in a bad position and messed up a game. It has really inspired me to slow down and look before moving during an endgame. Of course, with time pressure, it still happens. The tougher skill I am still learning is how to manipulate a game at the end to force a stalemate when losing. That is worth learning, but it will take me some time to master it.

Losses

Finally, a decisive loss... Chess is a game, and you can't win them all. Congratulate your opponent on a game well played (Yes, please have good sportsmanship; read my earlier blog post on this if you want my perspective on manners.) and set up the pieces again. We can only really learn from our losses anyway. So I try to see a loss as an opportunity.

Phew! You made it to the end? Well done! I wish you much joy in the game of chess!
Cheers!